TV Review - The Sopranos

The Sopranos (1999)
Ep. 1 - "Pilot," dir. by David Chase
Ep. 2 - "46 Long," dir. by Daniel Attias
Ep. 3 - "Denial, Anger, Acceptance," dir. by Nick Gomez
Ep. 4 - "Meadowlands," dir. by John Patterson
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD at JL's

I think my first take on "The Sopranos" will be in praise of how funny it is. Like a clown.

Movie Review - Miami Vice

Miami Vice (2006)
directed by Michael Mann
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
seen on the screen at Oxford Studio Cinema

At least Mann puts his cards on the table: blue filters, cities by night, and guns. The story's a train wreck but it's not a script that I'm watching. That makes Michael half right, but you can't be half right all the time.

Movie Review - Suzanne's Career

La Carrière de Suzanne (1963)
directed by Eric Rohmer
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

Unlike My Night at Maud's, this movie's protagonist isn't abandoning one pretty woman for a second. Moral Rohmer is big on the soul's salvation, intent on resisting the wrong temptation; romantic prospects suffer accordingly.

Bertrand's a dick - a self-conscious one - and it's nice for us to see carefree, sincere Suzanne find happiness. But Bertrand calls it her "revenge;" since he's the narrator, they're the last words we hear. I wonder if Suzanne's obliviousness to his pain is meant to condemn her. I hope not, Sax, but today I'm suspicious.

Movie Review - Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring

Bom yeoreum gaeul gyeoul geurigo bom (2003)
directed by Ki-duk Kim
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

More Buddhist fun than RL on guitar in a roomful of monks.

No, it's pretty depressing, actually, but in a nice way.

Pick of the week.

Movie Review - Charlotte et Véronique

Charlotte et Véronique, ou Tous les garçons s'appellent Patrick (1959)
directed by Jean-Luc Godard
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from the vaults

Unless this is the Rohmer short you're talking about, and it isn't exactly his. It belongs, in my best French accent, to your best intentions.

"That means 'I love you.' A bit forward of me, but it's all I know."

Movie Review - A Night at the Opera

A Night at the Opera (1935)
directed by Sam Wood & Edmund Goulding
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from As Seen On TV

Movie Review - The Girl at the Monceau Bakery

La Boulangère de Monceau (1963)
directed by Eric Rohmer
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

There's something unkind in this moral tale - the hero's cold shoulder on his way to the top. It's inhuman, and it's why I distrust people who think Rohmer's first movies are his best. Mid-career Maurice would stay with the girl at the bakery, not leave us alone with Barbet.

Movie Review - The Draughtsman's Contract

The Draughtsman's Contract (1982)
directed by Peter Greenaway
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from As Seen On TV

Late at night, this is just the sort of movie that's strange and engaging right up to the moment when it's suddenly very tiresome. What I like in Greenaway's work - a kind of magical, very literary pastoral - makes him interesting more than good. "Draughtsman" does have comedy, though, much to its credit.

Preview Review - Summer O-Six

Summer Previews (2006)
edited by Anonymous
rating: 1 out of 5 cravats
seen on various screens in Memphis & Oxford

Could I be less interested in anything coming to a theatre near me this fall? The answer is no. Maybe it's my subconscious backlash against unrealized expectations for, let's face it, the 2-star A Scanner Darkly. Maybe there's still time for my heart to heal. After all, isn't it nice when a director casts an actress older than his male lead? And isn't Charlotte Gainsbourg awfully winning in the trailer for The Science of Sleep? Of course she is.

Movie Review - Clerks II

Clerks II (2006)
directed by Kevin Smith
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
seen on the screen at Oxford Studio Cinema

Kevin Smith the public figure is unbearable and Jersey Girl was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. So it probably says more about me than him that I still laugh with Randal, Dante, and Jay, but, call me sentimental, I still do.

Movie Review - Alphaville

Alphaville, une étrange aventure de Lemmy Caution (1965)
directed by Jean-Luc Godard
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from As Seen On TV

It's nice to remember when Godard and Truffaut were friends, and escaping dystopia meant however you could leave town with Anna Karina in the car beside you.

Movie Review - Brute Force

Brute Force (1947)
directed by Jules Dassin
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from As Seen On TV

And the guiltiest canary is the man without a memory of the woman who broke his heart.

Movie Review - Laura

Laura (1944)
directed by Otto Preminger
rating: 5 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from As Seen On TV

What's remarkable is not how easily con-men and detectives, society heads and writers seem to fall in love with Laura Hunt, but how willing she is to fall in love with almost anyone who shows her some kindness. It's her easy heart that does so much unwitting damage to the company she keeps - just like you-know-who.

I'm also assigning retroactive "Pick of the Week" status to that little chiaroscuro by the sea, Fallen Angel. There's more atmosphere in the coffee shop of a sad coast-town ghost-town than any well-appointed apartment of the urban very rich.

Movie Review - The Warriors

The Warriors (1979)
directed by Walter Hill
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

Hip-hop's favorite gangland film meets rap's least-known moviegoer, who can't believe it's a long-haired Jerry Horne who delivers the picture's most famous line.

Movie Review - Fallen Angel

Fallen Angel (1945)
directed by Otto Preminger
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

In the gloomy, dreamy setpiece town of coastal Walton, California, a man stops at Pop's for a cup of coffee. All the old men love the same young woman, but one lonely woman loves Eric Stanton, and that's the rough edge in the night's obsessions.

Movie Review - You, Me and Dupree

You, Me and Dupree (2006)
directed by Anthony and Joe Russo
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
seen on the screen at Oxford Studio Cinema

You're not sure if it'll top the tagline, you read some bored reviews, you waver a little yourself mid-movie. Take it easy. It's just enough good-natured Owen Wilson to ease out the memory of those terrible pre-preview Wes Anderson ads.

Movie Review - The World

Shijie (2004)
directed by Zhang Ke Jia
rating: 1 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

If you thought the Fruity Oaty Bars jingle was the high point of Serenity, or enjoyed "Bear is driving!" from the animated Clerks TV show, or, heck, even if you watch "South Park," you'll really hate the animated chapter breaks in "The World." Proof positive that Jonathan Rosenbaum is most often, these days, a bastard.

Movie Review - Smokey and the Bandit

Smokey and the Bandit (1977)
directed by Hal Needham
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from JL

Movie Review - The Thing

The Thing (1982)
directed by John Carpenter
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from the vaults

That adorable dog and his big loping run makes it tough to hate the deadly alien creature snacking on a poor pup's cells. A wolfhound like that would burn right up in this Mississippi heat; maybe he could live in my cave and we could watch movies that take place in the snow.

Movie Review - Industrial Symphony No. 1

Industrial Symphony No. 1 - The Dream of the Broken Hearted (1990)
directed by David Lynch
rating: 1 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from Black Lodge Video

...and one for the little man sawing at a trunk...

Movie Review - Phantom Lady

Phantom Lady (1944)
directed by Robert Siodmak
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from Black Lodge Video

Sometimes I get caught in the same rainstorm watching the same woman in the same white raincoat as some stranger on the message boards at the IMDB.

"Elisha Cook at the drums and Ella Raines waiting for the train... that's all you need for this one."

Movie Review - A Scanner Darkly

A Scanner Darkly (2006)
directed by Richard Linklater
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
seen on the screen at Studio On The Square

Before he brings home a stranger for sex, Bob Arctor fights with Donna Hawthorne, who uses so much cocaine, she says, she has to be careful - prohibitive - of men getting close. Bob storms out and Donna runs after him, pleading for patience and then, taking his hand, Bob's company. Bob stops, he listens to her, and in the next moment he's in his bedroom with the stranger.

There's plenty of sadness in this film, lots of tragedy, but Bob's confrontation with Donna is the only scene where the narrative isn't dreaming - not lost in looking back, or worrying about what's going to happen. Just a fight - suppressed frustrations boiling over. And as much as I want to point to that moment and argue how convincingly Linklater builds a tower of his characters' collective disappointment around it, how the whole drug-addled enterprise just slipped a little too far out of its participants' control, there's simply too much in this movie that isn't Donna and Bob.

It looks good, too - pockets of cool, deep colors and inky, dark monologues - and I should probably stand up for my favorite director and add that problematic fourth cravat. Yes, I think I will.

Movie Review - The Passenger

Professione: Reporter (1975)
directed by Michelangelo Antonioni
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from JL

I like the early to mid-seventies period when foreign directors made big, international movies. "The Passenger," The Conformist, probably some other ones - those globetrotting Bond films have nothing on the locations used here, and no camera ever blessed James' Aston Martin with Jack's ragtop's gift of flight. Blowup is still the shallow half-mod it's always been, but Antonioni directed some really great pictures.

Movie Review - The Awful Truth

The Awful Truth (1937)
directed by Leo McCarey
rating: 5 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

Sometimes a highly recommended movie is even better than you expected. Top of the pops, heap-leaper, scene-stealer. As the antics of stuffed shirts and hayseed millionaires pile up around them, Cary Grant and Irene Dunne become young. Romantic as romance can be.

Movie Review - Firefly Unzipped

Firefly Unzipped (2006)
directed by Andy Davidson
rating: 5 out of 5 cravats
on DVD in the screening room

I don't know if it says more about the movies or my friend when he makes a fifty-minute, stop-motion, green-screen comedy from scratch - infinintely more worthwhile than Serenity - and my favorite thing is his voice work. It's the voices - mercenary, mechanic, throne-room lesbian - that make it look easy.

Movie Review - Seven Men From Now

Seven Men From Now (1956)
directed by Budd Boetticher
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

Bud, Burt, and Nate agree on the great scene in this great movie from Duke's "you remember the Alamo, right?" Batjac Productions. Peter, Quentin, and Clint think it's Boetticher's best film. Personally, I'm holding out for the matador documentary, but the fastest gunfighter in the West is always the one whose shot you never see. Jefty!

TV Review - Justice League

Justice League (2002)
Ep. 12 - "The Brave and the Bold (1)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 13 - "The Brace and the Bold (2)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 14 - "Fury (1)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 15 - "Fury (2)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 16 - "Legends (1)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 17 - "Legends (2)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 18 - "Injustice For All (1)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 19 - "Injustice For All (2)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 20 - "A Knight of Shadows (1)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 21 - "A Knight of Shadows (2)," dir. by Butch Lukic
Ep. 22 - "Metamorphosis (1)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 23 - "Metamorphosis (2)," dir. by Dan Riba
Ep. 24 - "The Savage Time (1)," dir. by Dan Riba and Butch Lukic
Ep. 25 - "The Savage Time (2)," dir. by Dan Riba and Butch Lukic
Ep. 26 - "The Savage Time (3)," dir. by Dan Riba and Butch Lukic
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

I'd like to remind everyone that my TV reviews are usually cumulative - I didn't watch fifteen episodes of "Justice League" in one sitting. This time. But I would have, if I'd known they'd tackle Arthurian legend, alternate dimensions, and time travel! Ha ha.

Actually, the three-part World War II what-if wasn't really very thought through from a "working paradox" perspective, but I appreciate how much sex the writers fit into this show. It makes the Flash seem like the only character who ever enjoys his job.

Review Review - The Worst Best Movie

The Worst Best Movie: Why On Earth Did The Searchers Get Canonized?
Written by Stephen Metcalf
rating: no cravats
online at Slate.com

"A movie made by semiprimitives will submit more docilely to extensive Rorschaching than a self-consciously dark and mature Western like Little Big Man or McCabe and Mrs. Miller."

I wanted a quote from Robert Altman in praise of "The Searchers," but when I couldn't find one I stumbled onto a page recalling (see it for the pictures) the first time Ford's movie screened at a drive-in in Illinois. Before its reputation, "The Searchers" was still a movie, bottom line as full of invention, awe, and spectacle as anything before it.

For Metcalf, the film is famous only because a certain group of people - moviemakers and academics - like to see themselves as open-ended romantics. Better to submit to a little less self-consciousness, blanket-head, and think instead of Ethan shooting out a dead Indian's eyes. The high wind off the desert carries the echoing smoke and sound in an instant, and all that remains is a crowd of silent, intimidated cowboys, heeled by the murderous look in Ethan's peepers.

Or maybe just this: "By what you preach, none. But what that Comanch believes..."

Movie Review - Two-Lane Blacktop

Two-Lane Blacktop (1971)
directed by Monte Hellman
rating: 4 out of 5 cravats
on VHS from As Seen On TV

In the end, I think I prefer Vanishing Point, for what's probably a pit-stop reason. When the young woman who's sat in the backseat of James Taylor's Chevy roadster for most of the width of America finally leaves her bag in a diner parking lot and rides off on a stranger's motorcycle, the race sours, it ends, and the protagonist men seem lost without her. In her absence, the film stock physically dissolves, Oates fades away, and Mr. Fire and Rain apparently kills himself.

The hero of "Vanishing Point" dies, too, but on his way to save a girl. Death is a choice, boldly made. But let's not bury them in small talk. Even outside the ol' "existential open-road" genre, both movies are two of the best I've had the pleasure to watch, as American as the jean-jacket on Peter Bogdanovich's narrow shoulders (which, come to think of it, is probably French).

Movie Review - The Squid and the Whale

The Squid and the Whale (2005)
directed by Noah Baumbach
rating: no cravats
on DVD from JL

As cold and as brittle as a movie made by a real person can be.

Movie Review - I Don't Know Jack

I Don't Know Jack (2002)
directed by Chris Leavens
rating: 2 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Black Lodge Video

Dear Jack Nance met a sad end in sunny LA, and what does it matter what you say about people, he was some kind of man.

"We'll watch a movie and we'll feel alright tonight."

Movie Review - The House On Telegraph Hill

The House On Telegraph Hill (1951)
directed by Robert Wise
rating: 3 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

Isn't the real hero of this amalgamated haunted house/frigid housewife/blue-blood noir the easygoing Major Bennett, a little inclined to too much drinking and self-deprecation, eager to help the woman in trouble and confident that, whatever her mistakes, she's worth his unconditional support? That and villain Richard Baseheart looks just like Doug Niedermeyer in a trenchcoat and fedora.

Movie Review - Why We Fight

Why We Fight (2005)
directed by Eugene Jarecki
rating: 1 out of 5 cravats
on DVD from Netflix

My capacity for disgust at the Bush administration climaxed years ago, and revisiting how different the world might be without his ilk makes me, frankly, too sad. "Why We Fight" is narrow-minded and, worse, condescending to the American populace it proclaims to fight for. I for one refuse to believe in the impossibility of real and valid change in this country; for Jarecki we might as well be the Roman Empire, our lesson learned too late to save us. That's nothing worth saying at all.